Why are handjobs necessary in class?
I guess calling a coworker a lesbian sea cow is some kind of violation.
something about eating while taking a crap just doesn't seem safe to me.
Don't put random dicks in your mouth or any other crevice for that matter... and i'm home in 30 seconds
Wish I got that text last night instead of this morning.
whats the proper etiquette for returning a closet door to a random girl you met and do not know her name?
What's he like?
The usual. Sarcastic, dark, full of fucked up emotional problems that result in fantastic sexual prowess.
It's like the last supper of drinking before the summer ends
you're asking me why i keep burn ointment in my purse.... do you really want to know the answer to that question?
I miss eating meals at a table and having unprotected sex..
I mean technically the bite was both in my nose and on the outside of it. I thought I was going to need stitches or something.
Why was his mouth around your nose anyways?
It was just one of those nights, man.
He got hit with a horseshoe, set on fire, fell out of a tree, and puked all over the side of his car, all before midnight. Everclear.
Felt so good this afternoon, figured I wouldn't have a comedown. Wrong. Just realized I've been staring at a wall for 40 minutes contemplating the color yellow.
All I've been thinking about for the past 12 hours is sex and SEAWORLD
I want to sit on top of her nipple mountains and reenact the Ricola commercial.
We stole a Christmas tree from the student center and then decorated it with everything we stole from parties... All I have to say is Feliz Navidad!
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