i just know my balls have never hurt this bad before
I got drunk and smashed his tv with the keg and so he blames me for being evicted.
Apparently I mistakenly called the hair club for men at 3am... they called me back this morning.
I started drinking at around 8.. Started heavily drinking around 815.
It's Friday afternoon and I'm drunk. This is how I cope.
Do you think drinking vodka, rum and sourpuss out of a water bottle, in a class that isn't even mine rude?
Watching her eat just hurts me
Taking Gomer to the ER. He tore something trying to stretch his nutsack enough to put his balls in his own ass. I need new friends.
i think you may have a shot to cock block in a moment. just saying.
Wake up an cock block please bc these are noises i dont ever want to hear again
We're super invested in me shitting to my full potential
She just won 2 Grammys at 17 and were sitting here hotboxing our half bathroom
we could do so many fantastic illegal things together. sexually and otherwise.
sorry there isn't a 'perfect ass' emoji
bullshit you weren't drunk, you pointed at me and said my cigarette was empty
she brought her phone charger to the bar this bitch is ready to drink
Randomize
