I really don't want to move...I'm having a motivation problem.
kev is about to show us pictures of the tranny he accidentally fucked last night.
I'll be there in 10
just had cupcakes and mountain dew for dinner-now i'm playing super mario brothers. 10 year olds all over the world would kill to be me.
He must be back home now. He moved his box of beer from her porch to ours.
how many americans can say they have been laid before eating their first big mac?
You are beautiful! I got thrown out of a bar tonight for throwing my shoe. It was at my sister, I don't know why they were mad. I know her.
i tried to climb in the window in the limo because i wanted the driver to take me to get noodles. ive reached a new level of fat kid
I taped a pair of scissors and a coupon for a waxing on the door. He gets to choose.
They shouted last call and the guy next to me and I looked each other up and down and went in unison "yup, you'll do"
You have amazing self restraint. If there was one thing I could learn from you, that wouldn't be it. I love my life as it is.
Do you think if 10 year old us knew that we would be passing out in a McDonalds after a hefty night of drinking, and 23 McChickens, they'd change anything?
I've been here 11 months and i just realized i have literally never looked at my apartment/roomates sober
If you can't have hot, loud sex in a dorm for the last time ever, what can you do in this world?
This chick walked up to me in the bar and started making out with me, then grabbed my drink while I wasn't looking and walked off.
I drank all the wines... and all th Doritos. Whilst watching Fat Camp. I need to reassess my values.
I covered the puke with a shingle there's not many chunks. I think it will blend quickly.
Randomize
