Take a Tylenol with a HUGE glass of water before you pass out, you'll thank me in the morning.
i dony have tylonal but i had a snickers and popcorn and a bottle of water and i am.. brushing my teeth!
One girl and one boy is just not enough.
They threw me out of the bar because I was arguing business ethics with the owner of th bar
girls mom is dying from cancer and she msgs me for a booty call. I guess people cope with their situations differently.
It's not just about fucking anymore... We decided we're actually in like now..
I can't wait. Forget the royal wedding. This is the most anticipated hookup of 2011.
Partial kegs from last night are currently in my bathtub, which leads me to 2 questions: 1. What are you doing tonight? 2. Can I use your shower?
Also, I cannot stop picturing myself in a bar, 3 years from now ordering soda. Just soda. 30 pounds over weight and wearing a cat sweater. I feel like I'm heading in the wrong direction in life.
I want to tell everyone I've ever met about how he him picking me up and fucking me against the wall was the highlight of my life. Worst lesbian ever.
Dude... I had a dream that I was getting high for the first time. I got to experience my weedginity again. It was glorious.
They should make eskimo sister bracelets. OMG WE NEED BRACELETS WITH IGLOOS ON THEM.
You spent the whole night conversing with your zombie poster, so I'd say you were pretty far gone.
How good was the sex? She sent me a fruit basket the next day.
I would but he’s not speaking to me because I put ketchup in his socks.
Spent like 2 minutes so far learning and 35 minutes in a group chat talking about big asses. Yet another Wed zoom meeting.
Randomize