yeah she was being a bitch. do you remember me stealing ryan cabrerra's beer?!?!
How does, "Im sorry I was such an intoxicated bitch, I didn't mean anything I said" sound as an apology.
There is only so much cookie dough and masturbating I can handle in one night.
There's two big trays of water in our freezer. I just hope they freeze by Saturday. for the ice luge.
its Wednesday...
they're reeeeeally big trays
I told them the reason I passed out was because of "heat exhaustion." Not from showing up drunk. Good thing this is Arizona.
What has two arms, one testicle and no credit card debt? This guy.
Now that there's no chance of him coming over to fuck anymore, I'm going to put up a one-person tent in my bedroom and live in it. My bed reminds me of him.
Just played slippy cup. Flip cup plus slip n slide. What did you do with your fourth of july?
Question: would Brian be pissed if I brought his 17 year old sister as my date to the wedding?
Gregs sitting in the living room in his underwear hitting the bong watching a rob schneider movie. His lack of fuck giving is inspirational
Dude. It's not even nine. I don't know yet.
Drink number four. Don't even tell me about its not even nine
According to you, you were with your "Eskimo bro for life" last night.
The shit I just took was four, very distinct colors. Jager night was a success
I should stop using "Braveheart would do it" as a basis for decision making...
My god imagine how much cum is in that astroturf
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