jersey shore drinking game rules must be edited. almost died. how is it possible for a person to say guido that many times
Hindsight: maybe I should have included a few transitional texts in between talking about your son and my need to have sex. Do over?
I should hang a sign above my bed that says "get hard or go home."
I think this breakup is Gods way of telling me I deserve a bigger dick
He stared me down while singing "Let Me Love You" to me while we were having sex. I don't know whether to marry him or file a restraining order.
Best orgasm I ever had! I though we totally connected and I asked him to stay over. He went back to the sigma chi house and returned with his blankie and a 40. please help
It was like we had a conversation with our eyes.
Was it a good conversation?
It was an awkward, sexual conversation.
the good news is that even if it's Alex's, I can still say it's Colin's, because the kid will come out ginger anyway!
who knew there'd be a plus side to your ginger fetish one day?
All she said to me before going to get another shot was "Damn, I'd eat her out."
you left your anal beads in the dishwasher
He fed me Girl Scout cookies while I was still tied up...what did I do right?
I just ordered a five person drink for myself.... Right about now you should start saving me from myself....
Yeah. I fucked her boyfriend, she knows, and she still wants to keep dating him. That's love.
Whose house did we sneak into and play beer pong for 4 hours at last night?
I honestly have no idea
so I just realized.. of my 70k student loan debt, most of it went toward bar tabs, eightballs, and sweet-ass ties to wear to gamedays and other people's weddings. I think about shit like this while I'm at my mid-level management position. you know. "working."
Look upon your future, America, and despair.
Randomize
