woke up this morning wit a massive hangover. walked to my truck and found at least 35 for sale signs, a stop sign, and a julie kim sign...need answers
yea, you decided to become a real estate agent last night on the way home from the party. You started bitchin about how Julie Kim was stealing all your buisness....
I would give away a ton of these clothes but I doubt there are any homeless people who dress as slutty as me
I fukin lobve the states. Girls here let me fuck them because they like my accent. I may not go back
Just saw an old man buy two cases of keystone light, a case of milwaukee's best and a case of icehouse. Degenerate alcoholic of senior citizen of the year?
I'm so glad i pay social security
I just looked at all of our spring break pictures... there's a guy getting a blow job in the background of the ones on the beach.
So he didn't pull out. And I like flipped out. And the he told me to chill and opened up a drawer full of packs of Plan B and handed me one.......
I'm at Home Depot to get supplies to fix the wall we cracked by fucking too hard against the bookshelf.
Ok not good, my info has definitely been submitted to this sugar daddy website before.
You're always so generous when it comes to your dick.
So I'm not dead, but close call. I think I can handle one more bar.
you just rode your bike home from a one night stand in a stolen skirt with no underwear and you're telling ME to reevaluate life choices?!
it went well until I said "me" instead of "my" and he kept sexting me in character as a pirate
bitch i am allowed to be rude i just fought cold hard porcelain with my face
Twas still the Saturday before Christmas \nAnd it’s still fucking snowing\nAnd Steve wished he slowed down \nOn all the fucking drinking
I need advice on ways to politely say “fuck you on your way to hell”.
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