dude she licked ball and has every Are you afraid of the dark episode on dvd
lock that shit down
he had a blacklight sublime poster, of course i had to do him.
So basically i got outta bed and started peeing on the a/c unit..when my roommate tried to stop me i looked at him and said "i got this"
Just slept with my boyfriend's roomie to learn if bf was cheating on me
Good plan. When in doubt, sleep about.
does it still count as break up sex if it's 4 months later? sorry i'm just looking for an excuse to fuck him.
so not only am i rooming with two chicks on the volleyball team, but we just put down the deposit on a hot tub. this is going to be the best summer ever for my dick.
i found him! he's on the front porch using a bag of potting soil as a pillow. i forgot i left him there.
She basically needs a man who will never act up and take all of her shit
I'm even having trouble finding a guy who's taller than me with no unibrow.. someone needs to tell her its time to lower her standards
Seriously, I woke you up with tacos, I think I deserve the best girlfriend ever award
We're going to ride the bus of mixed signals all the way to unrequited love town and that's where I'm going to live my life and then die.
Your phone just changed "liver" to "liquor" how dose that make you feel
I think I gave a random lady a dildo
Again?!
YOUR STATE IS STUPID
Did you miss a turn again?
WHAT FUCKING IDIOT DECIDED TO DESIGN AN ENTIRE FUCKING STATE WHERE YOU CAN'T MAKE A FUCKING LEFT TURN?!? FUCK NEW JERSEY
Of course I fucked her, her man stole my bike when we were kids
I’m photoshopping my boobs to up my Tinder game. I need better dick in 2020
Randomize
