until you tell me otherwise ill assume we're playing "cavity search" the homeland security game to spice up our sex life
He kept screaming "it's so seductive" while he was humping the wall
the moment we started interpretive dancing last night wouldve been a good time to stop drinking.
That is correct. I did in fact somehow pass out in the tanning booth for over an hour. And yes the attendant did have to open it up and shake me awake.
hes the hot one from work who thought i was dead after my party
where are you?
talk to ya later, gotta sled down these stairs real quick
So high I started thinking my desktop picture of a cat was too erotic for the workplace.
after you left he started opening his bottles by smashing the neck against the edge of the fireplace and pouring beer into his mouth. it was about the manliest thing ive ever seen. its probably how lumberjacks open their beers... if they didnt have their axes handy.
Alright if I email the police department asking for my mug shot do you think they will email it to me
I feel as though my head has drastically changed shape
How many times is too many times to use the word 'fuck' in my thesis?
IN OTHER NEWS did you guys see Orlando Bloom's penis today? I did
My mom found my empty case that I hid in my room and just said "now why don't you be a responsible underaged drinker and throw it in the recycling" and walked away. I'm in shock.
I just had a legitimate orgy. Wearing glowsticks.
i am risking my non lesbian vagina for your needs. i better be the best friend you ever had
Randomize
