She helped me organize my comics and then blew me. This is the one.
I was in the shower, he came in, had me give him a blow job, and left. I'm pretty sure I was just booty called. While taking a shower.
She was covered in mud grabbed my crotch and said see that handprint that means I called dibs
its ok, the prom king gave me his crown to puke in
I am a woman. I need to be selective about the porn I stream on my phone. Who knows if my cell will ever get lost, who will see it and what they'd think otherwise. Keepin' it classy tampa.
His hair looked like he was in a bukaki and then got a perm right after
I think anything that happens between 12 and 2 am is just sketchy enough to be a good idea.
Sweet tea and masterbation. It's how I manage.
Have you ever just like not slept in so long that everything looks like a lava lamp?
Why aren't you two playing Dora the explorer with each other's genitals yet?
Well, I just bought plan b with the tips I made from the job that I slept with my manager. So yeah, that's my life. How's yours?
Finally hooked up with her. She bought me tacos after because "she can do better in a bed". You're gonna be my best man.
Can i have the words "she went crazy and never came back" written on my grave?
He told me that when he bends me over that chair I remind him of a bull rider. So thanks for being the ex that helps my present sex life
She always used to joke about becoming a stripper. WHO'S FUNNY NOW?!
Randomize