is it cool if i come over and use your computer?
what happened to yours?
i got a little to drunk last night and threw up on it...then i tried to wash it off under the sink.
jess passed out on the pong table. it was depressing until we started singing shania twain an hour later and heard her muffled voice singing along.
I'm just not sure how to initiate the "do you want to have sex with my boyfriend and I" conversation
all he has to do is look at me on new years and hes getting laid. thats how hot he is
you called me and cried until i agreed to record a rap about our lives with you
He just climbed off me and used my hairspray to fix his hair. If he hadn't just gone down on me I would think he's gay.
yes, i was eatting raw cookie dough and fingering myself at the same time.... is there a problem?
were you high?
When?
Actually just blanket yes to that question
Yeah I don't even know dude. This shit has reached new levels of ridiculous. Let's hope baby Jesus gallops down a rainbow on a sparkling unicorn and wills that bitch clean. I think that's the best chance we've got.
I have tan lines from my nipple rings.
Who says no to sex and donuts?!
Went on a blind date. Afterwards I ripped my pants off and said "it's game time". He was into it.
he's a mother fucking interior design major!! we boned and fell asleep and now we're laying in bed discussing what color i should paint my room. i'm marrying him
we f'd six times
f'd?
its sunday, i cant say fucked
cant one of your roommates drive you?
You came in my eye once. You owe me.
ill be there in 20
Randomize
