god I hate her. why can't she just fuck and leave like a normal slut.
Just threw up on my desk at work. They are making me go home.
We can't all go after the girl with the low self-esteem
Fuckkkk i made out with a freshman.....but he's old for his age. THIS IS WHAT HAPPENS WHEN YOURE NOT AROUND.
looking at that huge scar on my leg from when i got drunk at 9 AM and walked into a grill. so excited for football season to start again!
i just looked in the mirror i look like i'm about to film a PSA about prostitution
Had sex with him again...yikes. and the whole time he kept saying "i wish we could do this forever." Forever lasted about 45 seconds
I just had sex in the footy bunny pajamas my mom bought me for christmas. Tis the season
When did we go from stumbling drunk into an ER at 3am to dinner double dating?
His favorite positions involve choking me out. I'm marrying him.
You peed in the sink and kept shouting "I'm the black swan! Ca-caw!"
Me and some guy are crying in a port a potty together after another guy broke up with both of us.
Okay so my roommate deals some drugs so whenever he leaves we can hook up, be ready
I didn't know I was the on call booty call damn
When they said they were gonna tattoo each other's gamer tags on their asses, I knew I no longer had a boyfriend.
Dick pics just aren’t doing it for me, this bowl of Mac n cheese and Game of Thrones trump you tenfold
Randomize