I was hooking up with him in my car, he wouldn't stop with my nipples, I had to literally beat him off of me. He kept groaning too while he was doing it. Sick.
Mommy issues
I've never been so happy to start my period. I'm gonna let everyone in the store see me buying tampons.
Just found the bucket list I wrote when I was high...somehow I dont think "jello swimming pool" is gonna happen.
I decided to have standards now that i've graduated. No guys without a bed frame.
i said she could sleep in my bed and she goes "iiiiiiii warned you. iiiiim a cuddlerrrrrr!" slightly regretting this..
i was holding a cup in her face for her to throw up in while screaming THIS IS THE DEFINITION OF FRIENDSHIP
A man just poked my foot with his crutches while I'm shitting. Is that how the disabled gays ask for a glory hole blow jay?
I am here to underwhelm you with my vagina
I also witnessed that same parrot perched on the head of a man grinding with a girl.
Interesting. As a girl I don't know how okay I would be with that.
She seemed pretty into it.
We've given up. My vagina is tired of constant lonely nights and disappointments. This is our retirement.
thanks for piggy backing me around for the rest of the night when I got too drunk to stand.
I told you that you should stop drinking and you responded "Thanks for telling me how to live, North Korea!"
He used the term 'cock-staggering' in an email. So needless to say things are going pretty well.
Would the comment "Down Goes Frasier" be too inappropriate at this time?
youll appreciate my drinking habit one day...
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