We can't ever have kids because there's a chance that they'll end up just like us.
he just told me his nickname was "nickexplodeon"
does that mean he doesn't last long?
Would it be too much if i wore depends to new moon so i dont miss any of it?
After 10 years all I have gotten is one bra pic, at this point I should be able to draw your cervix from memory
ii just google-imaged 'sad turtle' and maggie gyllenhaal only came up once. what is the world coming to?
There are rumors he has a square penis....ill do anything though....
He just kept petting my ear and informing me that I wasn't one of the guys
Swear to god, if I have to wingman for you on my honeymoon I'm gonna be pissed
Yeah, you're right, it's a conspiracy against you. This small tight knit group of people who don't like assholes.
It's gay softball weekend. Lots of hot gay strangers to go home with.
So it was all good until she started grabbing my beard and telling me to "roar little lion"
He walked in on me banging his sister and said "you're both old enough to make you own decisions. Carry on"
you do realize the next step is naked mud wrestling, right?
Not my fault people bought me shots. waving a shot in my face is like waving a cock in yours
I just want to eat chicken fingers and drink beer and smoke in bed with my laptop so I can watch Netflix
So your not doing THAT great with the break up then...
Randomize