S and I had anal without a condom because I'm on my rag but he didn't finish. Should I still take Plan B?
Have you ever wondered what your stripper song would be?
you also choked him out with your legs on the kitchen floor..
I hope in my next life I'm a sterile trophy wife. With a husband who showers me in wealth and gifts but can't get a hard on. Do you think my karma is good enough for that?
Turns out, his fucking is as lame and staggered as his NFL career.
So I did end up texting him last night... I asked him how he felt about haircuts... not sure where I was going with that one?
My neighbour is taking her hamster for a walk on a leash. Come over now
I was talking to another guy at the bar last night and all of a sudden a flying piece of Sausage lands on my boobs. Then I hear my boyfriend yell, "just marking my territory."
FOund a bunch of old fireworks spring cleaning.
Who is our new insurance provider?
Drunkenly making hamburger helper. I just whispered "I can't wait to have you in my mouth."
This isn't good. I can't find my mom. This is why we don't give her Fireball.
you took my virginity. you can't have my alcohol too.
i'm the most scandalous girl at stop and shop. i kinda have to fuck him in the meat cooler.
Your dick. My mouth. We have 20 minutes.
I teamed up with my vagina. I compromised his morals and then she corrupted him for good. It’s been a very successful and slutty partnership
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