she's in the bathroom. spitting in the trashcan. not throwing up. just spitting and singing bad romance by lady gaga.
thatta girl
I guess you can say it's a tradition... whoever brings home the ugliest guy has to do all the cleaning the next day
He said I taste like butterscotch, licked me, then I'm pretty sure he wet his pants. So no, I do not want to invite him over.
And for your info. Don't pee outside with glow sticks. People will still see you.
we managed to turn Dream Phone into a drinking game. don't hate.
Not quite sure what happened last night. I'll drive your dresser over to you later.....
Ripped lines in the bathroom before my presentation.. Got bonus marks for my enthusiasm.. This is why I love drugs
I've smoked enough weed to put down a pony.
I was giving a campus tour, when a drunk senior came up behind me and shouted at the group, "If Jesus ain't your homeboy - get the fuck off this campus!" Looks like his religion course is paying off...
smoked four grams out of a bong with a mixture of pool water and white rum. I applaud you for leaving before losing too many brain cells.
Like if Ohio doesn't think I can get smashed on wine I will gladly prove them wrong
One singular head for man, one giant climax for mankind
Just renamed the subject of my sex list on my phone "grocery list" just in case anyone comes across it
It's a Saturday night and I am in bed with two cats, a bottle of Riesling, and I'm masturbating to Iron Man. I'm great at being 21.
yeah....try hearing them in person. it sounds like two muppets going at it
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