Have you ever noticed that nowhere is the same thing as now here, i get my best ideas when i smoke
I'm outside your house...sorry I feel like I don't need formal invites anymore.
Just got head while drinking hot cocoa and eating cookies. Never in my life have I felt more like santa claus
Fun fact: Antibacterial soap will not take the combined smell of bbq sauce and vagina off your hands.
I don't know why I've never thought to take my bong into the bathtub before.
Woke up un the hot tuv. Climbed out fo the hot tub and fell asleeo. Woke ip again in the hot tub.
i think i have that disease where you wake up in strange places drunk.
i was that girl throwing up in the urinal. it was a dark moment in my life.
I was afraid that she would smell her boyfriend's penis on my breath while we were talking.
I can't stream porn because Xbox live is taking all the Internet. I thought having a male roommate would make life easier.
You can't just leave with hair like that
His last name was woodcox? That just screams I've got a great penis
Come here I'm naked
And I want mozzarella sticks
I'm shaving my vagina to the lion king soundtrack. How's your 9am?
If it makes u feel any better my dick feels pretty tender dude
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