I'm such a slut...i kept having sex with him after he called me his ex gf's name. I just felt like i deserved something out of it too.
Theres a disney princess moonbounce on karen st. and I'm drinking beer at a little league field. this might end with me in jail.
i dont know what was worse.. snorting the wasabi or puking on the neighbors dog
Apparently as she was dragging me out of the club, I was clinching onto this european guy screaming at Jenna: that's the 12th time you've cockblocked me tonight
Why is there a school picture of an 8 year old boy in my pocket...?
Dude, this guy showed up with a 40 and stayed for two days. I want that lack of responsibility
my professor saw me buying beer for the super bowl and said go patriots. thats how i know im getting an A in his class.
I just got a call from the front desk apparently one of my feiends was dropped off by a handicap bus passed out in a wheel chair unlv is goig down
Omg he has a washer and dryer IN his apartment and lots of back up toilet paper. I went home with an adult. My uterus is pumping out eggs beyond my control.
No he's great. He's trying to do "sexy stuff" for me now, which is pretty hilarious. He stirred my daiquiri with his penis last night. He also tied a bouquet of flowers around it.
I need to buy fuckboy repellant for whenever I think it's a good idea to meet boys I found in tinder
Ask him to BK for an ice cream cone and do him in the car. That counts as a date
He literally said from now on he's always banging chicks with asthma becuas it's such an ego booster
nothing like waking up to a voice mail saying your std test came back negative
I wonder how horrible I look to customers. There's cuts all over my face and I can't talk.
What are the cuts from? Head-butting the bathroom light fixture?
Honestly that's best case scenario.
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