i just told a girl i would suck the alcohol out of a deoderant stick
dude.. you lit a cigarette on the bus and told the driver it was okay because you were fire marshall of your boy scout troop
I hate how you keep a running list of people who have seen me naked.
She hadn't heard about the oil spill. She gave dumb blondes a whole new standard to aim for. I did her anyway...but that isn't the point.
So the answer to your question is yes, I was masturbating on the roof of my building.
She was shaking her boobs and I was so high all I could think was "breast maracas"
You need to stop having girl talk with the guys I'm sleeping with.
CHEMICAL ENGINEER. God my mom would be so proud of me.
It was his first time doing shrooms and we made him ride in the truck bed. But he kept standing up and yelling when we stopped so we had to keep driving
Thats why you dont have a "jubilant gunfire celebration"
I can control the tv with my phone while pooping on the second floor. I thought you should know for future reference
I wish I could be at this cabin banging all these old dads
But wait then while giving his drive thru order he goes in mid sentence, "Hey baby it's Travis remember me?"
Was so high at one point last night that while showering I was worried that using too much hot water would slow down our Internet.
Fine I'll cuddle you but only for the purpose of trying to survive
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