Seeing a catheter being inserted into a penis severely diminished my sex life
Just know that as we speak i am injecting vodka into gushers
I would've been fine if I didn't do the three shots
You did like 8
He acted like he was sleep fucking because I woke up to him screwing me in the middle of the night and he had is eyes closed and was mumbling things the whole time and wouldn't respond to me.
Is that even possible?
I called him by the wrong name to test him and he instantly stopped, rolled over and acted like he was still sleeping...I think he might break up with me tomorrow.
Get your penis over here NOW. emergency
My ex was there, the 2 girls I'm seeing showed up and I had a pocket full of VIP passes 2 the strip club. Had all the makings of an epic night but I fell asleep at the bar.
He said that I looked like a "ghost had crawled up into my vagina and died"..so yeah, I'd say the hangover was noticeable.
At least I made out with him before he made out with that dog...
Whatever the emoticon is for "balls deep". That.
Okay let's look at your past accomplishments you've done hungover... Sat great score, academic decathlon, state for track. I think you are solid to go out tonight
My philosophy is thug life and that means never having to say your sorry for stealing drinks off tables
Im just confused who has their mom break up with someone
But I did discover that he's totally okay with going down on me while I eat taco bell so that's a plus, right?
I was gonna jerk off, but then I thought about that movie last night and it killed that idea. I have serious boner trauma.
Let's just say when I woke up I was still drunk. My hangover hit me around noon so I chilled w my dad and took a bath and shower at the same time. You just can't do that at college
Randomize
