I must be too annoying 4 u.
Call me Kermit cause I'm about to go piggin
Where you are. You must stay where you are are
Where you are. You must stay where you are arewhere are youu
Where you are. You must stay where you 5eare wher are you!!
New realization: eye makeup remover takes sharpie off boobs
Woke up wearing just a scarf, the holidays are definetly here
i got excepted to unl lol
You mean "accepted".
The Shake Weight not only toned my arms but significantly improved my hand job form and efficiency.
I still can't figure out why that's not in the commercial.
She just said she wanted to get freaky and left the room. I'm almost certain I just heard the microwave.
I have pink band-aids all over my body, WHAT HAPPENED?
Keg backpack and a Bike
there's a guy in the del taco parking lot doing pushups. let's be his friends
So we came to a decision, you need to fuck your hot roommate and send us pictures. We voted, so don't hate the democracy this great country stands for
i just tried to use a string cheese as a light source
AHHHHHHHHH. I LEFT A GLASS NEXT TO ME WHEN I FELL ASLEEP I'M SO SURE IT WAS WATER BUT NOW IT'S VODKA JESUS MADE A STOP
He said I taste like cake. Like funfetti. So I feel like if he doesn't come back for that he's just dumb
And ANOTHER guy that I once got naked is doing gay porn now. Wtf? Am I the audition?!
Randomize
