i mean i cnt help that this campus has the highest STI rate
so i was creeping on him today and there was like nothing new except he became a fan of getting dome
i wish i could be like. "i like giving dome, lets be friends"
um i just realized that some of the people at my family reunion look inbred. thats not a good sign.
hahaha beady eyes set close together? defs inbred.
my dads cousin just put a cig in his dogs mouth and says, "look its a commercial for newport!" holy hell i hope im adopted.
You need to come back and get me. This is not a jersey shore party and he is not dressed as Pauly D and I am about one shot away from hooking up with a real fist pumping Guido.
so the last visual we have of him for the next 87 weeks is him outside on the ground rolling around yelling I HATE BLOWJOBS
In fact, not a good idea to go into any house alone after a man invites you in from his balcony.
obviously he wasnt ready for this jelly and you can quote me on that
i'm exhausted. do you know how hard it is to put together an outfit that is professional enough to secure a babysitting job yet slutty enough to let him know i'm down for sex during naptime?
its just been over 12 hours, and i`m dying, don`t know how i`m supposed to survive the holidays sexless
The second I see you we're shot gunning beers
It's gonna be 8 o'clock in the morning
And your point is?
Marry me
Also, you need to stop getting hammered and taking showers with people.
I'll just tell you, some how when we were having sex on Friday my collarbone got fractured.
Ugh I feel like I just got hit by a big giant sex bus.
Do you think my laundromat will notice that the bloodstain on my sheets is in the shape of a face?
Sometimes you wanna cuddle and sometimes you wanna get blown in the bathroom.
Randomize
