I'm gunna smoke cigs today. I feel like I'm in that powerful and gritty mood which requires them
I have a pretty basic diameter of my vaginal abyss. I'm sure it won't hurt.
Fuck Jersey, the house im in is so baller but this state just cannot win.
how hairy? two words: wookie tits
I woke up with her little sister yelling "she's dead !!" from the bathroom doorway.
Not sure if jager bombs can cure tuberculosis, but its a theory im testing as we speak
4 am. She strained the mac and cheese onto her legs. She has no skin.
Fair warning: We've transformed the living room into a giant tent.
lets just use each other and get past this awkward stage. forget my name.
TAKE ALL THE MAERHMALLOWS AND PUT THEM ALL IN THE MAGICAL NIGHTSTAND
So ahh..."Multicultural Night" turned into "Fuck the Neighbor Night"
Can someone please explain where the fish in the mason jar came from when we were at a bar all night?
You told the bartender if he gave you one of the fish you'd go away
It's like weed even makes my glasses better. Everything is so bright and clear and beautiful!
This morning he fucked me while I was brushing my teeth. So I kept brushing as he thrusted. Then I brushed his teeth with my toothbrush while he was still in me. So hygienic.
Drunk him got in a fight with his wife he literally bought a plane ticket and flew to Hawaii. He just called me and asked why I let it happen. From Hawaii hahaha.
Randomize
