i've alrwady decidided boys hate me plkease take notyes.
what
nvm
There is something about drinking on a golf course and getting with younger women that just really makes me feel at home.
I feel like banging her is an expected thing. But banging you would be like getting a 36 on the ACT.
it's my sixth sense. If there's an orgy within 20 miles of me i'll know about if. Or be a part of it.
Bering your kids um. Abiout tol. Throw up
I seriously told a stripper I would hold her hand when she goes to get ass implants.
When did our fuck buddy relationship, turn into me babysitting his dog?
Oh god he's like Julia Roberts in pretty woman... And I'm the one who's gotta make a lady out of him.
HOW DO I ALWAS FIND THEM?! THERE WAS BE A SOCIETY OF SMALL PENISED MEN AND I MUST BELONG TO IT!
apparently i tried to facetime the drunk bus last night, that's probably why we had to walk back to campus
Drunk ass.
Make sure you plan your visit for October. That's ACL festival, it's like every Bro in the country converges on Austin. My vagina wants to go hunting.
I think I puked in the middle of sex last night if that's any indication as to how drunk I was.
How's moving going?
Uh, we're on the way to the store to buy more booze
Woke up way too warm in the middle of a spooning sandwich. Was working up a rant about still not wanting a threesome. Then I realized the littlest spoon was the dog. Might need to break up anyway.
That 2-CB was ass.
You mean the asprin cut with pez?
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