walk of shame with early morning football tailgaters. niice.
Put your dick on his face to wake him up, dont worry its fine.
college "breaks" should be renamed "reminder why you left your hell hole of a life in the first place"
I just sat in the Taco Bell drive-thru waiting for a trash can to take my order. Yes, that high.
My piss changed color midstream. Think that means I have a 50/50 chance of passing the test?
God, i just love slightly insecure guys with hearts of gold and giant penises.
all i wanted to do was something grown up. like go to applebees and drink.
Can you explain to me later why there's a pirate hat in my bathtub
no, throwing your underwear at it is not the solution to everything
Come over, we're having a tea party. And by a tea party I mean we're drinking whiskey from tea cups.
I imagine my service panda will provide sufficient protection. At the very least it will be an irresistible cuddly distraction while I make good my escape.
I heard you coughing. Are you choking or smoking? And are you okay?
You have all semester to unpack your car, quarter jello shots only last until 10.
hey at least you are getting hit on, i spent all day researching cat sedatives
I'll keep supplying drugs if you teach me piano.
Randomize