tiger just fucked it up for all of us...she grabbed my phone this morning and started asking questions.
I would like to add..this is the first november for two years that i haven't cheated on a bf...thank you..thank you
how was ur day?
this is strictly sexting don't make small talk.
after I lost so many games of beer pong they made me be a troll, I sat under the table and told riddles while retrieving balls.
Ya know, since we do have alot of sex with each other i figure i should wish you a happy valentines day
Too many penises have met your hands. Stop or die.
But that background check said 51...Omg. If I hooked up with someone that's my dads age.....
Girl, he's like catnip for my pussy.
Me too...I'm driving to work trying to figure out if I put my pants on the right way.
I have an ideal penis or slightly above ideal penis in every country that isn't ruined by the specter of communism
I did a line of coke with my ex tonight. Talk about memories
Thanks a lot dude. I'm grateful to you for your gift of pure piss.
You were crying hysterically
So that's why my heels were in the oven...
Remember that time I came to London for 4 hours, got hammered, cried for an hour and then left.
It's your last night of vacation right? Be the Oprah of dick. And you get a dick... and you get a dick, and you get a dick!!!
Randomize
