i just sat at a stop sign for 10 minutes waiting for it to turn green. i need to STOP SMOKING THIS SHIT.
strike ten. I need to stop drinkng
Did you see the soccer ref give that girl the red card as she was being kicked out of the party?
You watched "From Justin to Kelly" and sang along to more than half of the songs. I didn't know whether to laugh or to be insanely frightened that you knew almost all the lyrics.
my credit card is covered in vodka and bad memories
he's totally gay but hes wondering what hes missing out on. Im going to show him.
no pressure.
It's official. The summoning powers of my vagina are unmatched by anything in this world.
So he ended up throwing a watermelon that he stole from the cafeteria saying "if i cant have it no one can" of the 5th floor.
Dave got tied up again. I'm done breaking into girls houses to cut him loose. At least before noon.
My boyfriend sold my favorite shoes right off my fucking feet last night outside the bar. It might have played a part in our breakup today.
Just woke up from a dream where I had lesbian sex with myself (a clone of me)... Take that, Freud!
Bored at work. googling vodka waffles.
I'm currently giving my drug dealer relationship advice. He's a nice guy and all but I'm really just hoping I get some free weed
So? Find me, fuck me, then you can go to sleep and I'll leave.
Wow. That's the most amazing thing anyone has ever said to me.
Please tell me why we have been neighbors since elementary school and waited until the night before I moved to fuck.
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