Ok pretty sure I just saw Mike O'Malley walking through the parking lot. I wanted to see if I followed him, would he lead me to the acro-criag, i've always wanted a crack at that bitch.
Update: we are pushing the start of day drinking back from 9 am to 10 am. Minor delay.
It made me think of you cause he just screamed "CAPTAIN PLANET" a lot and kicked people in the balls.
Single person behavior: I wanted a cookie but was too lazy to make or go buy any, so I let cookie dough ice cream melt and ate all the chunks. Pantsless.
Where is a good place to buy a New Year's outfit that acknowledges I don't have tits but screams I suck dick like a champ?
I'm so sick
I would imagine. You did most of your drinking for brazil last night.
That and I think I got food poisoning from sharing nachos with that homeless guy..
I like you as a friend, but I'm in love with your dick.
You kept trying to make people drink "salsa-ritas." But all you did was dump tequila in a half full jar of salsa, and shove it in people's faces while shouting at them.
When a best friend shows up on a tricycle with a case a beer and goes "get on loser" you get on, because there is a magical adventure afoot
I am going to be so excited tomorrow when I find this box of crayons in my purse
And now you know why we call him Three-Balls Brad
I'm gonna write a book. Almost Awesome: all the times I ALMOST got laid.
AND I NEED A VIKING FUNERAL OR MY GHOST ASS WILL SAUNTER ON OVER AND CASTRATE HIM FOR TECHNICALLY MURDERING ME
Just landed in Atlanta. Still drunk. I can't feel my face
I went with vodka instead of tequila tonight so I make better decisions. Fool proof plan.
Randomize
