Dork........ .......... .. . ...... ........... .. . ... ...... .. . .... ..... .. .... ... .......... .... . . ..... Yeah its morse code, no big deal
I wish costco sold astroglide.
i wish my brain was less awake, and didn't try and picture what you were talking about.
I just got eleven picture messages of my dick and balls hanging out of my shorts last night. I guess it really is summer when the fratastic, man-thigh exposing shorts come out...
Bro i heard that. I've seen so many balls this month its like march madness all over again
She counted 5,6,7,8 then intentionally kneed herself in the eye numerous times.
My mom just told me to make sure my face isn't on the front cover of the newspaper on 4/21. Challenge accepted
Took me 12 hours to be sober again. Shitshow mission accomplished
he's home with a concussion now...but apparently i'm still the highlight of his freshman year
I like the fact that you've for some reason taken my penis into protective custody
Sware then you fell into me doing a Tarzan swing thing and my margherita spilled and shattered all over this guy and sice you were on the ground you tried to pull it off by twerking on the floor lmfao
No, it's ok. He's Greek. To him I'm just a light drinker, not an alcoholic.
He called me in the middle of the night to ask my shoe size. Apparently big feet would make me an unsatisfactory third for the threesome.
I REMEMBER NUGGETS BEING THERE BUT WE WERE AT A TACO BELL
I shaved my asshole for this. That's real dedication.
I got dominos and had to stop whilst eating and take a moment of silence for how good it was
Apparently when you start crushing adderall and blending them into your margaritas calling them blenderalls you have "a problem" WTF
Randomize
