I puked the same amount of times as the number of bars i went to last night
After going down on me he either said "there, it's over" or "there's an odor"... I couldn't hear him and was too embarrassed to ask him to repeat himself. I just got dressed, grabbed my bag, and left. So I don't think there's gunna be a second date. =(
Let's roleplay tonight. I'll be drunken diva and you be sexy sober.
IF that's your way of making me dd then count me out.
no where in the syllabus does it say "no alcoholic beverages allowed".
he just came in and straightened the chair and left again
... there are chew marks on my license. I have no idea.
Note to self: Do not bring gift bag with cock ring inside to family Christmas. Leave to unwrap at home.
My drunken abilities have only improved since college....I can navigate the streets of chicago like no ones business, do push-ups to hail a taxi and instantly become an mma fighter after 3 shots of hennessy
I guess I can give it a shot. I usually just get belligerently drunk and go where my penis and feet lead me. No fights or getting too lost, so they seem to be doing a good job
He threw a twenty at the stripper and asked for change
well did he get it
....yes
You know, I think I'm going to rock the shit out of this whole mid-twenties thing. Fuck babies and weddings -- I have vodka and young cock.
I don't think stranger penis made your tonsils bleed
I made a booty call at 3:30 am on a Monday... I think I just became the ultimate female fuckboy. I don't know whether to be ashamed or get myself a trophy.
I broke another vibrator the other day. Abstinence is not for me.
like honestly, the vodka had to go somewhere, and your moms soap dispenser just seemed right at the time..
Randomize
