so i'm sitting in his room drinking tequila from the bottle and watching harry potter. he's jacking off to some porn a couple feet away from me. at one point i look over and see that he's watching me instead of the porn. please help me figure out how warped it is that i found that romantic
he wanted me to dress up like someone from lord of the rings. I dumped him.
You guessed 7 of 8 bra sizes correctly. You're like a drunk rainman.
I'm sitting the next couple hours out. Puking in a potted plant really put shit into perspective for me.
When the officer tried to stop you, you just shouted your name in his face. repeatedly.
I think I've lost the thrill of being a slut. It's just that the newness has worn off, I think.
he picked an earring up off the bar floor and tried to give it to girls as a present.
The night started going downhill when I set my foot on fire.
Guy, there will be accountabilities this weekend that you will need to respond to, or else.
Currently getting "blaow" buzzed into my pubes. How's your thursday?
You made out with him a lot. Almost as much as you told everyone Paul was the zamboni guy.
Fuck him and his perfect arms, huge penis and relentless ability to ignore me.
Thanks for being my best friend so I can use you as an alibi to my family while I'm out getting some dick in my face.
i just remember singing the theme song from 2 and 1/2 men to my hair
Can I say it was a great night out of town? Fucking my co-worker in the hotel bed while my best friend is fucking his friend on the floor and a random guy is laying in the other bed meanwhile we are all passing a joint back and forth
Randomize
