she told me she sucks everyone's dick but mine because mine is too big and "hard to suck" i need to reevaluate the girls i fall in love with.
I've never heard a "this is the reason why i dont suck your cock" explanation go in that direction
I'm sure that's not what the inventers of the Turkey baster had in mind, but that's what I had in mine.
Our halfway to Halloween party needs to never happen again. There were waaayy too many wasted cartoon characters passed out in my living room this morning...
Shes definitely an expert at this. Her happy hour goes from 4 to 11, then she starts drinking heavy. She also allots 15 minutes each hour for a pee/bj break
Dont get mad at me, it takes two to tango
IT TAKES ONE TO EJACULATE INTO THE OTHER WITHOUT CONSENT, AND SPOILER ALERT, ITS THE ONE WITH A SCROTUM FULL OF SEMEN.
I was only out of town for 1 week. His cell records show he texted 63 ex-gfs and hookups while I was gone. And 10 condoms are missing.
It was fine until he came back to my place, grabbed a beer, HIGH-FIVED me, and left.
He stopped responding after the animal pictures... I do this EVERY TIME.
How is it that I've hooked up with not one but two guys in the children's section of a bookstore tonight?
Just had an hour long talk with a woman, turns out she's the mom of the guy i lost my virginity to. Even better his dog was also present.. Meeting the family at its best?
He doesn't deserve you. Your ass looks 8 times better than his face ever will. Wanna order pizza and watch porn?
I really love you gals. I'm sorry again. I'm just super protective of my poutine
Its like the floor is slow but life is fast?
I see you found the nyquil...
I drank all the wines... and all th Doritos. Whilst watching Fat Camp. I need to reassess my values.
I was giving him head and he slipped one of those hats with propellors on top on my head.
Randomize