im in a room full of women tattooing each others tits. i hope i remember this tomorrow
so, i drunkenly called my religious roomie because i was lost and told her if she couldn't come find me, jesus would condemn her to hell for not leading me to the light .. too much?
Sorry I wasn't really responding earlier. I was really fucking high and so into that car chase.
If I say "It's good enough" and I'm not talking about a sandwhich, that's your queue to stop me, you're supposed to be my friend.
"Take a picture of me motorboating molly" was probably not my best career move
no, literally. he fb chatted me and said "since you're online i figured we could bang tonight?"
There's three frat guys comparing how you were in bed. apparently you have gotten worse with time
We were on the balcony tossing jello shots to people passing below
When people said no i'd yell "i tried them i promise they aren't roofied!"
Santa brought me a 1.75 of wine, and a liter of patron. I probably won't remember Christmas, so don't ask me how it was tomorrow.
Sad Megan is Sad
Have you been drinking my beer?
Every time he asks me if I'm horny I'm just like come on...stupid question
He is dating a girl who is on the Olympic shooting team...I've never been so scared to hit on a guy with a girlfriend in my entire life.
i've created a new STD.
I just want to lay in a bed of egg mcmuffins and cry
Somehow my family started talking about sex toys at breakfast.
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