Will you still be my friend if I read and enjoyed Twilight?
No
well since you're still married, you will be paying for my abortion right?
me and my mom are sitting in the bank parking lot drying my beer soaked check with the heat... the whole car smells like heinekin and I'm trying to convince her I don't need a.a.
Well regardless of where or with who you will be blacking out and i will be pouring shots down ur throat like a baby bird
You beat him at the shot competition, and proceeded to rub it in while telling everyone to "ASK ME A MATH QUESTION!!!"
I just showered sitting down with a sippy cup of water in there with me. It took 40 minutes. That hungover.
I was like can I please fuck your hips back into realignment
Send me a picture of our booze closet. I'm homesick.
my liver is dry heaving
it's not rock bottom until you fall down an escalator on the way home from a hookup and have to have you dad come pick your drunkass up at 3am. Adulthood.
I left my Bacardi and dignity in your freezer. Will come get it later.
does anyone know where bryan is?
last i saw he was naked, and crying in the bathroom because there was no more booze.
so how about you dont randomly call my mother during parties?
I only gave you one rule about using the beach house: don’t get cum on anything!
You’ve seen my tits! You had to know that rule was unrealistic! Does it help that he was really cute?
Is it wrong to want to use the Dark Web to buy Vyvance for legitimate purposes?
Randomize
