I introduced my face to asphalt last night. They didn't get along.
this kid at 40 friday greeted another kid by saying "heeey farmville neighbor"
dude.
yep. needless to say i didn't meet anyone and spent yet another friday night masturbating.
you know how they say when you die, your whole life flashed before you? well do you get to see what happened all the nights you blacked out?
I think her nose is broken... but I think she's just drunk enough to fall for the whole "sex releases endorphins, so it'll feel better" line.
the threesome consisted of him fingering dana while i laid next to them watching how i met your mother.
I can't think of anything besides pubic hair fallout. Ugh.
i love all of you. Physical. Emotional. Mental. All of it. When we speak i feel like a feather or a dragon depending on the conversation ...
I wore water proof eyeliner just incase the first picture of me of 2012 is a mugshot
Really?!? Does he think blocking me on FACEBOOK means that he doesn't have a kid with me?!
dude, I convinced you I was your conscience for like 15 minutes last night. you weren't just "a little high"
I went with plan f. get drunk and start a fire in my yard
True I am eskimo brothers with every one of my room mates, but it was only two girls. And 9 outta 10 times I was first
I haven't been drunk for four days and just realized I haven't taken a shit for three. This can't be healthy.
Which part?
Apparently we fucked, I kicked him out, then he came back and we did it on the coffee table and in the kitchen.
i told her we had a class about unicorns together. i'd say it was a good night
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