FYI..good luck when you get back from work.. mom and dad know about the boy you brought home last night
haha good one..how did you even know?
we all know. he obviously didn't leave when you might have told him to.. he came down when we were eating because he coud smell mom's cooking. the dude ate with us and offered to say grace. so yeah, good luck.
my door was closed and her door was closed but even over the r.kelly playing at full blast i was able to hear her say "THAT'S NOT THE RIGHT HOLE!". Def rethinking my roommate situation.
the worst part is we had a camera rolling
Did his mom notice it when she saw u guys?
Yes.
I have to watch that.
I feel like vodka or no vodka, you'd still be trying to button your cat into your comforter
it was literally the size of a crayloa marker. i didnt know what to do with it so i just sat there
riding the spinning bikes at the rec after Valentines Day was a baaddddd idea
Next year we will be 30 and no more shots during the week.
Let's just say that watching the sunrise in a space helmet is really the only way to do it.
Well apparently I'm no fun since I won't have a threesome with him and my mother.
apparently the last bar didn't like my halloween costume with syringes filled with whiskey
All I remember is a very aggressive two-stepper who inadvertently made me give myself a black eye with my own beer
Using all my books as packing buffer for my liquor bottles. And you said being an English major was worthless.
We shared a dick. We're practically sisters!
He fired me, I fucked his wife, we're even I think...
He also needs to focus on not being such a little bitch, but that's none of my business.
Randomize
