so im kinda of nervous about the whole bust inside event last night
You drew a self portrait of yourself on his wall with sharpie.
It's my fault I'm alone. My closest relationship is with my blackberry....thank god it vibrates.
MCAT status: Day 64, no longer can remember what sex is like.
I don't think my arm is broken I can still text
She has an emergency bra in her purse. I'm gonna check no on the 'introducing her to my new boyfriend' box.
the ball fondling will be left out of the trip recanting
i just woke up reverse cowgirl on my couch. fully clothed. my laptop is on the floor sideways. blasting gay porn and lady gaga. pizza crust everywhere. goodmorning.
Wow just saw this. Nothing like a little anal sex to ring in 2012.
And now she's hand feeding me pork rines and showing me her angry birds high scores. This is Vegas.
We can just keep having sex until one of us finds someone we actually like
Who wrote "the chamber of secrets has been open, enemies of the heir beware" across my bathroom wall?
I'm smoking a bowl with matches and a candle while my mother washes dishes downstairs. I thought adulthood was supposed to be different.
The profile of her ass is just unreal. Weird way to use profile I know, but never more accurate
My books smell like weed. What does that tell you about my college experience?
Thumbs up
Get ready for me I'm full of tequila and I want to be full of you next
Randomize
