Lol i'z typing this with my 962 nose
962=my?
Yeah.i
i woke up to him dangling his cock in front of my face
Nothing says "get your life together" better than waking up in a tub full of your own vomit. Twice. In one night.
i made potato chips in weed oil. what did you do today?
Seriously, in what other class can the final major discussion be what bar you're going to with your prof?
ex-cheerleader. ex-gymnast. ex-dancer. i dont even know who to go for tonight
I couldn't find the bathroom last night...so I wrapped myself in the curtains and stuck my butt out the window and peed from two stories up. Thank god I don't remember.
there is vomit in the pocket of my dress coat. i remember thinking "this is a weird place to puke" at some point in the evening, but i dont understand how i did this.
Is it wrong i wouldn't sleep with him because his boxers said #1 dad all over them?
Oddly enough I feel totally fine now. Clonazapam and red bull the breakfast of champions.
we played animal sounds and i linked arms with her cuz we were both cats....fate and my community college drama teacher have chosen my one night stand
My doctor wrote down abstinence as my form of birth control. #ihavenodatinglife
Yea it's also hard to turn down a man asking you out with a chicken sandwich.
I'm stuck in a tree and request your assistance ASAP
I haven't included my nuts in a shave since the Shaq/kobe Lakers era. I gave my self the ol full court press in order to change the tempo.
Randomize
