So I'm cool with the whole break up, but it sure is a shame we didn't get to use those handcuffs.
We sat in your minivan all night in a parking lot pretending we were in the magic school bus going to the sun
her boyfriend dumped her for my exgirlfriend. so filming our hookup is pretty much a definite.
he just sent me a pic of him naked with a bucket of margarita mix hanging off his dick
mid blow job she looked up and said "we aren't even facebook friends!"
He's just sitting there staring at my sisters teddy bear hoping it will come to life.
PS: I just woke up from my shower
For thanksgving we are only drinking wild turkey for the next 24hrs time to strap your balls back on and maybe a helmet
Ps we bought 8 pellet guns just now
I'm also sorry that I ate your chicken sandwich while you were throwing up....
you got drunk, told him he looked like shaggy and said 'I wouldn't show you my mystery machine for all the scooby snacks in the world'
I don't think I've ever had this many people offer me blow before. 3 o'clock on a Thursday. I keep good company.
True fear is being unable to remember where you hid your weed and vibrator in your parent's house.
I love him about as much as I'd love fucking myself with a cactus.
she's pretty fucking smug for someone who has had unprotected sex with a convicted felon
I farted in the parking garage and it echoed.
Randomize
