what happened last night??
everyone saw ******'s vagina
and that's just the beginning
Just saw some guy walking down the street rapping about various types of pasta.
She challenged me to a game of rock-paper-scissors for her virginity. I love this girl.
You were playing beer pong by yourself. Finally someone took the ball and threw it into the bonfire. You sat by it, cried, and contemplated how to get it out. For 45 minutes.
Tell me the dirtiest joke you know
Sarah Palin
god, I love you
it's circumsized.
I think this conversation is over.
If I had KNOWN you and mom were coming to visit, I wouldn't have passed out in the frat. This is why I hate surprises.
Well yes but because of that incident i now salute to truck drivers
It was like giving head to a cactus.
It's all fun and games until some random starts jerking it on the deck.
He'd rather cuddle with his shitty little miniature dog than the half naked girl in his bed. I've lost all hope for him and my vagina
You are an awesome peach made of glitter.
My liver needs me to go back to work asap.
I just gave myself a foot massage. #SingleAsFuck
I still have to bake cookies and shave my legs so Mike can have MILF & cookies when he gets home.
Randomize