I just peed or puked all or around my parjibgb lot.
parking. I am not drunk
Fantastic night. drank beer from a wine bottle, danced on a van, chased a llama, and fell from a fence
Having an 'SDSU Mom' sticker is just like say 'Hi, my daughter has an std"
I have taken lazynest to a new level. I took a picture of the notes on the board instead of writing them. I win.
I don't know where I am but there are firefighters
But when he came on my stomach I noticed how tan I was!
What would you say if I got first degree burns on my nipples from drinking coffee topless?
They said an hour before I even see a doctor...and they noticed the shots tally on my arm.
It took all the strength I had tto sit at my desk and not tear off my business attire and run screaming from adulthood and flourescent lights.
He's taking me to Tao. This is going to be so weird. How do you go on a first date with a guy that has seen you naked more times than clothed?
Would you like to get an apartment bong? It can be like our pet and we can give it a name.
Update: He still has devil magic genitals.
I bought a machete, tennis balls, and matches. How is this NOT going to be a great night?
If I'm not naked in the back of a cop car having sex by the end of the night, I did something wrong..
I thought I was at a rave until the paramedics started chasing me. You win again tequila.
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