She is in my trunk
I never want to see another naked old woman again.
Any toy can be an adult toy. Location, location, location.
so he stopped for a second, looked up at me and said in a really creepy voice, "I can has cheeseburger?" and then went back to eating me out.
Hooking up with one of the deadbeat dads from Teen Mom does not qualify as banging a celebrity.
everytime someone would look at you, you started to try and deep throat your beer bottle.
If i had 4 hands right now is have booze in 3 of them and my cock in the other all because you went to denver. just sayin.
All I know is....there's beer in my camera. How do I know? Because I can pick up my camera,shake it and HEAR, the beer in it
Free tacos and bad night are never used in the same sentence
He is into some weird shit i walked in his room last night he was waving his hard dick around hitting shit yellin cock fight
There are Vine videos that have lasted longer than he did
alright well Taco Bell Closes at 12 so you better pray to god she's asleep by then or I'm running in your house butt ass naked with a bag of tacos
We inadvertently arrived at the strip club on Bear Night. The dancers all look like young Santa Claus and there's a buffet....
Having sex with him is like yoga. I do it in the morning and then can't walk for three days afterwards.
I party with great urgency now.
Randomize
