I figured girls wouldn't be down to sleep w/ a guy who plugged a pregnant chick
my roommate just said, "don't look at it, just put it iin your mouth"
Yeah sketchy neighborhood.. Some woman ran by screaming, "i didn't steal anything" as some cops rolled up and arrested her.
All I remember is taking a bath, puking in the bath water numerous times while trying to wash myself and I must of eventually given up
I think drinking everclear was a better idea than taking a night class.
And if I hated you I'd probably say things like, "I never want to speak to you again," or, "Eat a bag of dicks." That's how you'd know.
now that I know that you did coke with your mom I can't look at her the same
Please rescue me. but take your time, im getting pizza
There are twenty thousand men on this campus, please have sex with someone who isn't my drug dealer
he was having a black light party and drinking manischewitz wine out of a three foot tall trophy he stole from mcdonald's...that's when I decided it was time to leave
You are not going to get a pat on the back from me for not fucking that 40 year old again.
He literally just patted me on the vagina and said goodnight to it.
On a scale from 1-10 how fucked up would it be to buy weed with my fafsa money?
It's a study aid
Its not something you can force it it just has to happen like a rainbow or pooping
my favorite part was when you kept waving @ that guy and insisiting it was your cousin..and it wasnt and wondering why he wasnt waving back lol you were legit PISSED
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