Had a 3 sum last night, and today food just taste better and the air seems so much fresher!
after last night, i judge her for not breaking up with me
Just found the book "How to Stay Christian in College" on my roommates desk. At a loss for words...
I just ate nachos topless with a fork. Live with meeee
I feel like the only solution to this is to get naked and lay in the shower for a hour then see what my penis wants to do.
Just to clear things up. I did not walk in on him jacking off to your facebook profile.
I cleaned out the fridge, had to pound the brews. I am going to be wrecked for my final at 1
I'm handcuffed to your bathroom sink. Save me.
i also took my stockings off in the bathroom and blew my nose with them in the cab ride home. james was appalled
For the record, it's NEVER ok to discuss my stripper-related injuries with my fiance.
Gotta get new sheets. ..I fucked the satin off mine.
The Royals are in the World Series. I've never drank so much in one week in my life.
Hey. You dropped and smashed your road beer in my store last night. Again. And this time you didn't even order anything. You just walked in, yelled "SWEDISH STYLE!" Then lost your beer, looked depressed, and left.
No dude shes like 5 feet tall and maybe 100 pounds... Normally i wouldnt be scared but someone gave her a bat. Thats why im in the bathroom
All I want right now is a waffle and some fried chicken and a penis.
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