Cool, I just put that together. I didn't know if using a tie-died sub machinegun was too crazy
Dude, I think my check liver light just came on
Even My mom was ashamed of me bringing her home, she pulled me aside, and told me i can do better than, "butter faces"
I just threw up during my phone interview for the largest PR firm in the world.
just graduated on the spot on the quad where I vommed freshman year. full circle
i think he drugged the pie. i'll get back to you on that later.
Just write off about 10000+ brain cells and 6 months of your lifespan.
Sounds like a normal friday night
I lost it last night. That was humiliating. Cincinnati is now covered in my puke.
Update: That guy is no longer in the restroom, so he's probably not dead.
You have not lived until you've had your brains fucked out on a broken down Tunnel of Love ride. Life is good.
When the hubs wants to wear his training mask during sex and pretend to be Bane you just go with it.
It would be weird sobbing cry sex.
It's only ok to pee out the window in the afternoon when you're drunk.
I'm pretty sure I went in the girls bathroom and vomited everywhere then looked for a urinal for like 20 minutes
Question: anytime during the past week did I drunk dial you and give you full permission to grab my boobs? Cus I know I said it I just don't remember who I said it to...
Randomize
