He poured the shots. We did them together. I cheersd him out of the shower
NASCAR RACE 2010 NO REGRETZZZ!!!
It is literally 8 in the morning.
Kayla got stiches in her face. Rode in an ambulance shotgun. Tried to steal a baby, thought it was mine
Its funny that cleaning up pieces of water balloons and shot glasses every morning is becoming a routine
Seriously... Things should be way more awkward... The entire female half of the bridal party INCLUDING THE BRIDE blew me in high school....
You expect me to find someone in two days who I feel comfortable enough with to ask them to get drunk and go play in foam with me?
I wish my brain had a "congrats you just defeated the munchies" notification!
It was dark, she woke me up, gave me a blowjob and then whispered in my ear: do you know who I am?
FONT CPME TO THE TRUK. I REPATE SONT COME TO THE TRUCK WERE GETTON FRAEKY
Would jacking off with Benadryl cream be good or bad for the poison oak on my dick?
"Let's do body shots off the freshmen" is officially the worst thing I've ever said.
You know that you're in a bad spot when the doctor puts you on 500mg of amoxicillin 4 times a day for ten days and puts refills on it...
It was a good hour of moans, penis compliments, smacks, and what sounded like someone running in flip flops
passed out on bart again and decide to bike home. biked thru a goat farm of angry goats, biked on the freeway, got stopped by the cops, and sat shotgun in the squad car while the officer driving got a video on his iphone of his partner riding my bike on the freeway.
Oh. My. God. It is NOT okay to drink Johnny Walker when there is no Jameson. My skull is eating my brain.
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