You should dream of me :)
I'm going to dream of single life.
just saw a guy try to order booze in his coffee at 8 am.
I wish I has some fucking Fairy God Parents, I want a kit kat so bad.
I think she kind of thinks she's better than us now ... please. I go to Michigan.
thanks for stopping by when you did. making a meatball quesadilla while high was a bad choice
I never thought I'd say this, but there is a life threatening amount of rumpleminz in our freezer
I need a gatorade, my back cracked, my crimper, my shot glass, a sock of rice and an explanation.
You did this to yourself.
He stole a bottle of grenadine from the bar. And got arrested. His new cell mate is going to love his bright red lips.
More cowboy butts than you can shake a stick at, oh joy.
My dad, when he got home and saw me loading a bowl in the living room: "We have TWO beautiful balconies to get high on and you pick the couch?!"
we gave you a glass of water and you just started yelling: TWO STRAWS, PATS AN ENGINEER HE'LL FIGURE IT OUT
Well yeah connect the two together, then you can lay down and drink.
It was all fun and games until she said "you're so pretty I wanna punch you in the face" and the proceeded to punch her in the face
Just took a shot of 151, rimmned my middle finger in it, lit it on fire and lit a cigarette off it while flicking off my boss. How was your night??
you must be at least a level 5 friend to unlock my sexual orientation
I just kept hitting the drum to get thru the crowd to the bar. Surprisingly it worked
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