No idea how I passed that sobriety test.
Black thong, sheer white shorts not a professional look. This chick has no idea what sunlight makes her outfit look like.
He just said "I made some changes in my life. The male g-spot is in the rectum and I wanted to explore that."
vodka and carrot juice, if im gonna drink i at least got my 8 servings of vegetable
...She just said, "We've been blessed with good drugs lately."
3 months til "no sober october" start prepping now. i cant have you bitch out on me halfway through like last year.
Just sent my cousin to buy me a new bra cause mine is zip tied to a bar in the middle of nowhere Iowa
Dude, she doesn't even live here... She just can't eat all our food and masturbate on my dog's couch...
She thinks I'm afraid I'm gonna get caught in one of my lies and some of the girls I'm fucking will find out about each other. But it would be a relief to offload a few from the old crop and work in a few newbies into the rotation. The organization could use some new blood.
There's someone howling in the parking lot. Haha.
Definitely broke my toe and messed up my knee walking back. Drink hitch hiking should never happen again.
And anyway at least being paid in opium makes a cool story
Do me a favor and scream dirty things at him in a polite sexy, come hither way
u woke up and asked who took ur pants off then realized u did n almost cried over not gettin layed
Theres just something about today that says lets get drunk, dont you think?
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