But i did once see a show where a women was homeless and installed a stove in a school bus so she and her baby could live there since all the seats were taken out. As far as being homeless goes it didn't look half bad...So this is me promising to you that if i ever am living in an abandoned school bus...i will at least pimp it out with a stove so you can come over for dinner sometimes
so now that im really awake i see that my underwear are completely ripped down the side, my shorts are on backwards, i have to go get plan b....i call last night an epic fail or success depending on how catholic i am feeling
I would like to thank collapsed soviet republics and fathers who didnt show enough attention for tonight's festivities
No vaginas are yucky and I don't think you're old enough to handle one yet
He told me about his girlfriends trust issues during our post sex spooning
he knocked over the vodka and juice...picks up the cup and says "yes", takes the last sip...doesnt even worry about the mess all over the floor and we continue having sex.
Hah, I lost the lenses in my glasses, didn't event notice til this morning... How was the meeting?
I am still sore from last night. I can't wait for you to meet my parents.
I lost my flask somewhere between dancing shirtless to The Spice Girls and walking around Wawa opening/eating things and putting them back.
Some old chick is rubbing my thigh and saying she needs some Memorial Day dick. Her teeth are kind of gross but I'm going for it.
You left me alone with nothing but donuts and my thoughts.
At leat we can cross off 'having sex in a classroom' on our bucket list.
The dick lei will go down in squad history
You tried to stop drinking but then she started feeding you tequila with a spoon. You were like an adorable baby bird.
I had sex upstairs in my parents house, and my mom texted me and said "those raccoons are out of control in the walls."
Randomize
