It was like his mom forgot to breastfeed him and he was making up for lost time.
Asian chick on skype stripping for me. Hold on give few min
He wanted me to blow him while he was playing guitar hero. there will not be a second date
apparently i'm really good at getting wasted, having sex all night, getting multiple hickeys and oversleeping father's day brunch. this is the third year its happened.
Hypothetically speaking, what is the proper response if one gets bitten by a most likely not rabid squirrel? Hypothetically.
Today, my boyfriend informed me that I look like my dad when I orgasm
The "don't have sex with him again" alerts you set on my phone just started going off.
Good. "Seriously, don't do it" should start in about five minutes.
Couldn't find my swimsuit top anywhere this morning but finally found it in the skimmer of the pool so thats how my night apparently went
but how can he casually chat with my father 8 hours after asking me if i'm a screamer
if you arent using your penis to save lives, then what good is it?
you know you're a stoner girl when you get a callus from your grinder
Also, your girlfriend apologized to me about yesterday. That was nice of the cunt.
I don't know how to say "Sorry I was banging your boyfriend before I knew about you but you're awesome and we should hang out." without just saying it.
we can no longer cook chicken in the house. his name is herbert, we are keeping him and can not eat his people in front of him.
You barfed off the front porch while the elderly neighbors were walking their dog. We had to convince them not to call 911.
Pics or it didn't happen.
Randomize
