the other night i did but this one wasnt and it was so random. i was hooking up with this boy who wanted to roleplay and pretend to be snakes
It's the eternal vodka... it never seems to go away
This has been the most pleasant arrest experience I've ever had.
Is it sad that i just saw my moms thumb on the table & i instinctively put mine down cuz i thought she was thumbmaster?
At a party. It smells like teen pregnancy and sadness in here.
are we fucking for lunch or am I using my vibrator ?
you literally stared at me for three minutes and then said "hey this tequila isn't gonna drink itself, boss"
Didn't think the day of being the oldest in a club would be when I'm twenty one. Even the bouncer looked surprised when he ID me.
he just exposed your dildo usage to the table.
We have a shopping cart in our front lawn. Also Mickey D's breakfast?
I'm sitting next to the guy that peed in our drying machine
Well yeah. But im not sure i trust the black out drunk high girl giving life advice
I'm ne vrr drinkjng againnnnnnnn dforeal.
Her blowjob technique? Picture someone attempting to drink a triple thick milkshake through a Capri Sun straw.
I just discovered my new vice. Cotton candy vodka. Its like a carnival in my mouth, puking of the tilt-a-whirl included.
Randomize
